After reading a blog of an angry teenager, I started to
think back when I was once that age. I grew up in a household where my mother
was an over bearing control freak. I understood being grounded during my high
school years, but when it went into my twenties, she made my life hell. I grew
up going to church not out of my own free will, but to accompany her and look
like good children in front of her fake friends. I remember being in my
twenties and having to be home by 11pm or having her call my friend’s parents because
I was no where to be found. After getting married and moving way out of town
the only feeling I have toward her is pure resentment. She gets upset that I do
not call her on holidays or her birthday, but I have no desire to maintain a
relationship with her. I know my mother is mentally not stable, but she is
extremely toxic and that is something I do not need in my life. I see parents all the time just
screaming at their children, but never listening to their side of the story. Even
if my child has done wrong, they still deserve the right to a fair mommy trial.
I don’t ever want to become like my mother. When I pass one day I want my
children to cry because they loved me and will miss me, not be sad because they
were never able to have the relationship they wish they would liked to have had.
Wednesday, May 29, 2013
Friday, May 24, 2013
The Vacation
Why is it every time our family plans a trip (mostly me) it becomes exhausting. The packing is the biggest obstacle of them all! Having a ton of kids and a clueless spouse because extremely irritating. If I left it up to my husband the kids would have nothing to wear and everyone would starve. I've come to realize to book flights in the afternoon because my spouse seems to be hard of hearing the days before when I need to pack, hence leaving me to pack into the wee hours into dawn. I have learned if you forgot to pack something know that deep inside it is your husband's fault for only packing his own gear and leaving the rest up to me.
Thursday, May 23, 2013
That one song...
It's funny how music can trigger a memory from the past; call it nostalgia or whatever you want, but some how it can move you. Recently I came across a box of old CD's and started to listen to some of them. I remember the good times with friends, high school, first night club experiences, and Vegas road trips. I also remember the bad times, the groundings, first heart break, friendships falling apart, and a death. I will never forget the boy that took me to prom or the first guy that really broke my heart. I will never recover from a tragic death of my friend that happened two years into my marriage. I will always regret not fixing our friendship the way it used to be, but some how I know she is okay with me. I also wonder what happened to the people that came in and out of my life, would we have been great friends or was it just for fun? Looking back on how things were I would have like to changed many things, but I also know my present would not be the way it is today.
Even though my life is not an adventure, I will always have my one true constant and that is my husband...
Even though my life is not an adventure, I will always have my one true constant and that is my husband...
Friday, May 17, 2013
Birthday or not to Birthday...
Turning 27 again is not as exciting as it was the first time. I had the most amazing dinner with my wonderful friends, at a little hole in the wall tapas bar. This one really tickled my pallet, it had avocado (obviously) fish and brandy mayo. This place is located in the heart of Jefferson Park on the corner of Bryn Mawr and Milwaukee. I love that it is BYOB and the owners do not clip you a corking fee. The down side is I do not drink wine due to the fact I'm either allergic to the tannins or sulfite in wine. As unsophisticated it may be I will just stick to my cocktails in the mean time. Even though my night was cut short due to a friend having little more wine than she can handle, I would not changed it for the world. I love my friends and the company alone out weighs my younger years bar hopping.
Is this thing on?
"Honey, don't forget to tell your mother, the kids and I will not be going there for lunch, because I am sick". Two hours later "ring ring" caller id says mom. I take it he forgot to tell her. Maybe because he was born a man, he lacks common sense and has the delayed to do list gene, who knows. Please make my life easier as your wife and listen to what I say. It's not a difficult task, but you choose to make it that way. When your wife tells you to take out the trash, it pretty much means that very moment, not ten minutes from now or an hour, but now! A lot of times my husband has the tendency to forget what he is assigned to do, but low and behold his friend asks for a favor, he's there in a flash. Please explain that one to me? I am not the evil, bitching, nag he makes me out to be, the problem is, he need to open his ears! I know there are many wives out there feeling the same exact thing, is there a solution? no, it's inevitable.
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